What do you think of this passage?

Well the beginning is rather cliche 'It's a...day' has been done a million times. There's too much description about what people are wearing. I'd suggest getting to the heart of the conflict sooner because it's not bad, but it simply lacks a hook right now. Plus you switch tenses anyway with 'It's and then 'walked' then back to 'Angel is.' Pick one and stick to it. Don't say BFF, abbreviations should be avoided if you want to be taken seriously. Good luck.